being The woman...

Like all the other women under the sun she too likes taking care of her man..she likes to cook hearty meals for him, and feed him well...it gives her immense happiness when he is well-fed (yes both mentally and physically)..she likes to pack his meal-boxes, sometimes carry them over to him when he is too exhausted after a busy working day or a strenuous exam..it is moments like these when her heart tells her to stuff his mouth with spoons full of comfort foods...his well-being keeps her content and giver her the peace of mind..and sometimes a word or two of appreciation from him flies her to the seventh heaven..she loves giving him surprises all the time (he is not that respondent though!!)...a small gesture of love and care, a little flower, a word of praise....just anything to make him feel good!!!and yes gifts!from tiny ones to the most massive extravagant ones...for him she feels exclusively expending...each gift must be well thought-after and  yes unique!as much she would love to host a house party for him, what really drives her is their one-on-one time together (and yes when both are intoxicated and high!!!)...THAT is the real deal....she likes dressing up for him, and dressing him up as well (oh!how handsome he is!my heart just skipped a beat!!!! :P ) her naughty-self loves to evoke general envy when they walk amongst the crowd together-hand-in-hand-walking-like-they-own-the-world-like-kings-and-queens....she likes nursing him alone in times of illnesses (though she keeps praying he must never fall sick), becoming the cure, the immunity and the fighting spirit . she wants to become his in every possible manner, and wishes to stay by his side in highs and in lows, in health and in sickness, together in good times and in worst possible times and in life and in death..she wishes to attend to all his major and minor needs..staying awake by his bedside or sleeping closely knitted in his arms..she loves to give him comfort, happiness, everlasting love and completeness...she loves to evoke the mad passion in him,taking him to the highest peak and bringing him down to ground, both quivering together-short-of-breath-wet-tired, yet so calm, so fascinated, so satisfied and so fulfilled.. She loves doing things to him that only she can do..but above everything she likes to put him to sleep in her arms, and watch him sleep like a child-assured-pampered-content and  awesome...she has always been this woman for him,a real woman indeed- inspiring her man for even the most tiniest nano-seconds in his life..

the static change

i see people changing there career status instantly as they have well fitted themselves in this popular social networking site. while im still the same old lame lazy-ass "who gives a damn about what" chick.. i think im a like a dinosaur and im soon to be extincted. im happy, i honestly am just that one little piece missing from the puzzle.."Foodie" my new name. thank you sir that is a complement to me. meeting simple people, meeting as complex ones too you never know how I differ from who you know I to be...to be or not to be was never the question, the question was when! today i come to realize the power of silence. Hell! it spoke a lot. Every other thing in life is prior to change, the process remains static..oh!clever clever universe! how clever are You! I see, i chuckle, and i appreciate...play along am all game for you.
P.S: not to forget my heart remains with the same prick! that ain't gonna change...cause loving you was The Process for me.

torshar kobita

 তোর্সার প্রথম কবিতা ...

দুঃখ  বুঝে  পাচ্ছিনা তাই ,
বেজায় সুখে থাকি ...
নাম দিয়েছ  দাওনি ডাকার আরাম ,
নিজেই নিজেকে  ডাকি... 

আদরবাতি

গভির অসুখ
নিশীভেজা মন শুধূ ছুঁতে চায় আদরবাতির মুখ 

About time

A boy once told me he didn't have faith in love, he was too skeptical about the nature of being for a little boy, i knew a little girl back then who believed every single word he said. The girl hadn't seen the world yet, to her this boy was the wisest hermit she ever knew...Believers have a different fate altogether and this girl was a believer  personified...Then every little girl grows up one day to meet another inconsequential menace in which she finds serenity; and every little boy becomes a man to realize its never too late to start having faith and hope; they only add dimensions to our lives only to broaden the corners of our mind. I tried explaining my theory of god once to him and the arrogant teenager he was hushed all signs of believing instantly only to stumble in life and to get back on his feet again to find that one ray of hope in her and through her to connect to love, to the eternal power that i ever held sacred.
I see that boy now; that mystic light in his eyes fading away as if being cursed by some ominous grief; that ray is yet again fading away. But this time the boy has his soul tied to truth.....Lost boy i know one day you will find your home, your happy place, i wish you never had to fall just to learn how to hold on....Now you are a believer and wisdom will find you to enlighten your heart with contentment  again...Sweet boy in-case you ever wonder this is farewell from your once known friend....My love awaits my return and so i must...my heart is filled with her light....I wish you all the best...

P.S: I think i will paint,sing and write again and this time it will only be for the truth that rests in our hearts and runs through our arteries like life....to love...

a note to the trans

yes,this post is for you...though your never gonna know, that is the soul reason why i am writing it. true i love you, it is no news....i love you like i hate you....and darn you! history yet again repeated...you say you love me a million times....yet am not convinced, i don't wanna be. its dangerous. woman you are amazing. your sweet,polite, humble, beautiful, nice....but yet too sweet for my taste, and then im not into women...im just into you, as you are in me. life plays strange tricks on us, especially with me...yes, yes im mind fucked i know. But who the hell are you? no its not a hate message. i wish of a day when you wont be ashamed or hesitant anymore to accept what is what to the rest of the world. now dont give me the whole "privacy hush hush y should other people matter" stuff... the whole point is nothing else matters apart from you and me, so why the hushes for the non-existing fuckfaces....i wish of a day when i'd be able to trust you like i use to..it will make me secured, and it will make our lives easier. and dont get me wrong i do wish to conceive but not from anyone else,i wont have anyone else,ever.... i am your woman, i belong to you and solely you...i dont show it, because im scared, the day i show my real feelings to you, you will backstab me just like the rest of the world....but you are my man,n i wish to stick to you...

stupid situations

i don't know where im standing....mixed impulses running under my skull...dunno if i should trust you or not...someone deep inside says you will break me into pieces one day like he did...u say u love me, that's all im gonna want ever...i cant say for sure that you do....stupid me, stupid situations...im hurt....i know its all gone, dunno if that's true....cant say for sure...i love you, i really really do....i go crazy at times, may be because thats what i am....the reality is too hard to handle...i have my own stories, you have your share of the world, your little own history...you say you'll wait...how long! i cant tell....i know its all gone, buried...but it hurts me so...im stupid,stupid,stupid me...why?why?why? why not me?why not me?why not me? im so so stupid....stupid situations...