time flies

It's almost been a week now, since i'v felt myself breathing in your arms,
almost a week since u'v touched my lips, not even with your trembling gentle fingers,
almost a week since i'v spent my cozy and lazy afternoons all wrapped up in the sweet stench of your being... almost a week...Sigh!
No matter how much i try to deceive myself, i fail to dissociate Me, from all that loveliness i thought was there in my life..Presumptions!

Time continues to fly away in number of counting weeks, and days, and minutes and even in seconds...i stare hopelessly at the wall clock like i use to many months back. it ain't a pretty sight. I so wish i could have it caged, all that we had, the good and the best, locked in a chest, hidden safely somewhere.

Words are becoming silent gradually. All the efforts made and sweet nothings said to each other are now becoming fragmented, broken into bits and pieces, never-ending chat-lines are converting themselves into unnecessary courteous word exchanges.
I love you for giving me a beautiful dream, a more meaningful something which i could hold onto...and I hate you for making all of it become mundane in due course of time....

Fragmentation is the primary symptom of any disease, and diseased is what we have become..Two diseased souls separated by the universes, united in their agonies...
Even the agony becomes something to cherish sometimes, something to cling onto... A friend taught me this.

I know more such weeks are yet to pass by,and more agony will come along, to find there remorse, to justify themselves, and i must be patient, i must hang on, as i'm the only one left to listen to them.

Come back in good times love, and in the fondest memories...Take care.

funeral notice

Some people are there in my life,
they are not just people, but chaos
and they never seem to go..

but they have to, they must go.
it will happen very soon.

A new Dawn awaits

i dunno how to begin and what to begin with....another year gone,another approached. One learning it gave me....nothing in this universe stays empty, not even vacuum...like an absolute golden rule, things get replaced, people get new faces, relationships get new name and even feelings convert...Someone has to leave in order to make room for someone else...Change is a constant paradigm. Years come and go, its just a matter of time, and with time and experiences the prototype undergoes frameshifts and scaffolding.
The year 2014 when it came was as insignificant as my present time mental state, but now when i look back (Ya! i do that a lot!) im surprised beyond anything to find out some real time frame-shifts. I am not that girl i once was anymore, im somewhat with more grey hair, not on the outside though, but when I come in vicinity with Me, i can not count all that grey, it gets tiring.
Jake! you left!like everyone else...I know I had pushed you away, I know you had to go.....Its just my visit to my memory lanes remind me of, and then again life had taught me in hardest way promises are meant to be broken...Not that you intended to, but a break is a break enough just to bring you back to your deadeyne
, where you no longer can live in deception. And people call Me Poser!!!i laugh...dunno what else to do.
This year taught me one more thing, the best answer to all the pain is laugh, so i laugh it all away, and the best answer to anger, misjudgement and failure is patience, so i sleep on them...
Phishy boy, i miss the laughter in you mischievous eyes..My heart Yearns to see you happy, and your smile come up to your eyes once again.
This years has given me friends in a place where friendship was least expected. Naveen, Vijay, Aniket, i hope you stay for a while...Im getting too used to our stupid crazy laughter, naughty conversations and all that good thing. Friendship heals a lot, and a lot faster, its true.2014 taught me....
Babe! You're an Adonis, and you've been living at a substantial distance..where the longinquity has always been so high how can i not see that i had always lived in the outskirts of your heart, never been an insider, and never i will be..At times the bewildered eyes do not see beyond mere perceptions. I have been blind likely.
I am slowly and gradually retiring, withdrawing myself from all your essence, all the bewilderment, and from the outside world. I am retiring to my abode in my core, where words dwell deeper than those who carry them. I am going away. No one shall ever notice before i remove my last stench from the quintessential surrounding. I am sorted.
I am going to make this look like an evolution, you will never know, no one would ever feel that something is wrong when i am not around, ill make it natural, just like gone winds, rains, summers, winters and gone time.
This is my resolution for 2015. As the dawn approaches let me touch the light, and become one with it.

Amen!!!